Life is one book after another …
We all write a few books in our lifetime. Most of us never go as far as finding a publisher but our stories are documented and the moments are stored in our memories forever.
The best moments in all of my “books” are those with my family and friends but my most treasured moments will always be the ones I share with my children. Those moments are the highlights of my “books.”
Life is about relationships and both life and relationships start in the womb. The relationship formed in the womb between mother and child is the strongest, the bond unbreakable, the love unconditional.
Values are what makes or breaks a family and unconditional love is the glue that holds us together …
As a very young, inexperienced mother and wife, I had to find my feet and establish my own identity quickly. I had my own ideas of how I wanted to raise my children but advice was coming at me from every direction. It was overwhelming to say the least.
I did listen to some of the advice and to this day I still value the advice which I chose to take on board. I will always be grateful to the people who were there to support and guide me when I became a mother. I soon realised that not every piece of advice was best for me and my family. I wanted to be the best mom that I could possibly be but on my terms … the best way I knew how. I made a choice to put the needs of my family first, before anyone else and to raise our children on instinct. It had to feel right to us as a family and not to anyone else. So I didn’t always follow the rules and I had to face the criticism and raised eyebrows … but it made me stronger and I became a better mother. It was liberating and definitely worth it.
Very early on I realised that to me, motherhood meant loving unconditionally and without exception. My children would always know that I loved them no matter what. I would not always agree with them but I would always love them.
Unconditional love came with the realisation that I had been blessed beyond measure and that God had trusted me with the lives of two human beings … only for a while. I do not own them, they do not belong to me but rather they have been ‘placed in my care’ until they were ready to take care of themselves.
I had to be constantly aware of this responsibility that was placed on me, in order for me to allow them to become who they chose to be. I had to be there to guide but not prescribe, to influence but not dominate and to love without expecting anything in return. Unconditional love meant respecting them enough to allow them the freedom to make their own choices. It also meant trusting them enough to to know that they would choose what was right for them most of the time but at the same time knowing that they would also make the wrong choices … more than once. These would be the times when they would need my unconditional love more than ever … the times when they needed to know without a doubt that they could come to me and not feel judged. These would be the moments that would make or break our relationship.
It has not always been easy and there have been numerous challenges along the way, but the moments have been priceless and they continue to be.
Was I always a perfect mother? Not at all. Did I make mistakes? Yes, many. Do I have regrets? Absolutely. Have I done a good job? No, I did a great job and I am super proud of myself and the young men I have raised …
As I start writing my next book, I have been asking myself how I will go about showing gratitude for this new blessing of becoming a grandmother. The answer is quite simple. Do what feels right, love unconditionally, trust and support the parents … its their child not yours, relax you are a grandmother so enjoy the moments!
This is the prelude to my third “book” , “ACCORDING TO GLAMMY – becoming a grandmother”. I invite you to turn the pages and explore the chapters with me.
Thank you Zinhle for giving me a little corner of your world and for sharing your moments with me. You are an incredible woman and human being and you inspire me every day. We are blessed to have you in our lives. Your positivity is contagious. I have no doubt that you will be an exceptional mother and that you both will be amazing parents. Follow your heart and your maternal instincts and do what feels right to you, you know your baby better than anyone else. I will always be there for you …
Step into my book, turn the pages and explore the chapters with me. I am excited to share my moments with you ..
What kind of relationship do you have with your Grandmother? Please share your moments in the comments below.
Life is Love