Time has always been a fascinating concept to me.
As the years go by things change and life evolves. People change and change their minds. Some things grow and some things die. Wounds are healed. The list goes on and on.
One of the biggest challenges I used to struggle with as a female DJ and business woman, was setting aside time to start a family. I was concerned about losing relevance should I decide to take time off. I always wanted to have a child, I just didn’t know if my career would allow me to take time off and focus on this big and life changing decision.
Being self employed, my next paycheck depends entirely on me. Taking time off to have a baby was something that had to be thought through and planned properly. Timing and planning were the most important factors in making sure my pregnancy wouldn’t ruin or adversely affect my career.
The pregnancy had to be planned in such a way that it did not clash with peak season for my DJ gigs. I know it sounds crazy but it was part of the plan to conceive in September or October, in order to ensure that I would still be able to perform in summer and take maternity leave in winter. The winter months are generally a less busy time for DJ’s but August is a busy month for female artists and DJs, so I needed to make sure I would be ready and back on the road doing gigs in August.
That was the pregnancy planning around my gigging. I never really took time off from my Fuse Academy and ERAbyDJZinhle duties. The day before my baby was born, I was at the office making sure that things are running smoothly.
I believe in planning and as much as I missed being on the road, I took my time and enjoyed every part of my pregnancy. It was a beautiful journey and on the 8th of July, my angel was born. Kairo is my world and I want to make sure that she has the best of everything. In order to make this happen, I need to work hard so I can provide for my child. Kairo’s dad is supportive and he takes care of his child but I also have the responsibility to make sure she has a bright future.
Kairo is 3 weeks old today and I am already back at work making sure that, at the start of the new month, my team and I are fully prepared for our August gigs, media interviews, customer activations and new erabydjzinhle product launches.
Many young woman put off having kids for the sake of their careers and I fully understand such decisions. It’s hard to climb the corporate ladder while holding a baby in one arm. Every woman who wants to have children, should be able to experience the blessing of carrying and having a child but society still puts pressure on women and too often having a baby is still viewed as a career hazard.
Men do not have to take time off work to have kids. I used to watch my baby’s father with so much envy every time he went to work. Yes, he was expecting a child too and he was happy but he didn’t have to stay at home on maternity leave. After the baby is born, he doesn’t have to be home all the time to make sure that the baby is bathed, fed and the nappy changed. The main responsibility of caring for the baby lies with the mother.
I have heard and read a few comments about how I am back at work too soon after the birth of my baby but I haven’t heard anyone say anything about my baby’s father being back at work so soon after Kairo’s birth. I am a working mom but that doesn’t mean I love my child any less. I do not feel any guilt about going back to work. I will still get time to be with my baby and family. I continue to plan so that our lives run smoothly …
well, as smoothly as possible.
I love my job, what I do gives me joy and I will not deprive myself just because I am now a mom. I will work hard and hopefully one day I can teach Kairo about the value and importance of hard work. I want her to grow up to be a strong and independent woman and the best way to teach her that would be to live by example.
I had my baby in my thirties and this was perfect timing for me. It will be different for someone else but I think what is important, is for women to know that it’s not impossible to have children no matter what your career choice is. Your situation will be different so make it your own, plan properly and know that, even as a mom, you can still take over the world.